It hits me hard 😉

A child is a gift from ALLAH.

We always heard it. Or at least, people around me often discuss it. It is indeed 100% true. Burden by them sometimes, tired almost all the time but still worried countless time and loving them forever without condition or limit.

I am a mother of three superheroes, 9, 7 and 5 years old. All three are different. But they are definitely the biggest gift from ALLAH SWT. And this is a story of my eldest son.

He is totally a conventional man. Ignorance on an unimportant thing (of course based only on his judgment 😄), straightforward in making a decision, doing just what he likes, left everything everywhere, not much talking but more action, it's a NO when he said no and only YES if he said so. Believe me, he is a real conventional man. At least that is what I think, no offend 😎. But he is also the one who gets what he learns really fast, always listen to me, never give up searching for a solution for each of his problem, loving his brother in his annoying way and sensitively react to almost everything (in a good or bad reaction). He is my best friend and also my biggest critic.

He always being lovely and give a compliment.

Ummi, I think you are right on this thing. I knew u always right.

Ummi, u are beautiful today.

Ummi, I love you.

Ummi, u look tired, go rest, no cooking. Let ask ayah to eat out today.

Your nasi lemak always taste the world to me.

Ummi, don't give up (with hugs and kisses)

But, he is also saying what he hates the most or thinks it's wrong straightly.. (again 100% based on his judgement..which is unfair to me 😃..)

Ummi, u look fat. Stop eating.

Ummi, you look like a ghost. Do you put something on your face?

Ummi, what did u cook? It tastes weird. Bad.

Ummi, u bought scarf again? It totally a waste. All look the same to me.

Or, u already have a lot in the closet. Why u need more?

Hurmmm... it hits me really hard. Always.

And what hit even harder. 

One beautiful day when I feel like getting attention from all the boys at home when they busy playing games.

Ummi : Abang, help me pass the message to ayah. (he is listening while playing his Minecraft game on the bed and ayah is playing PS4 with his brothers)

Abang : OK. What it is?

Ummi : Tell ayah, if he doesn't kiss me, he doesn't love me.

Abang: (He gives me a cynical smile and continue playing)

Ummi : Why did u grin like that?

Abang : (He looked at me with an annoyed reaction). Do you know that kissing is not the only way of showing love? Do not kiss never means he doesn't love you. (continue playing his game)

Ummi : You better stop playing and just pass the message. (He walks to his ayah which sit just outside of the bedroom)

Abang : Ayah, do u agree that kiss is not the only way of showing love?

Ayah : (Smile satisfactorily)

Ummi : Both of you go find other room tonight!!!

Abang : Oh, come on ummi. Of course, we love you. It's you, who doesn't love us when u said that. 

Again. It's definitely true. I always joke that to my husband when we are having a different point of view about something. But I never thought that is actually another way of saying, "I don't love you. Go away from me.".

Even it is a joke, but it's something negative which should not come out from our lips as everything is a doa. To all pretty women who read this, let's change it into positivity.

To you abang, thanks for always be my reminder.
Thank you ALLAH for the best gift ever.

Footnote:

Does anybody ever have the same moment as me?? Let's change it then. I know. I know it's unfair. Totally wrong right? I am more than agree. It just us being a woman who craves for a show of love affection from the people we love. Is it too difficult for them? Not even cost a pence or a minute of their precious gaming time.  

#indenialmood😄

#it'sreallyhard